The May Pole Dance

The glorious blossoming of Spring eroticism...

Could there be a better holiday?

Beltane.

The ancient festival held on May 1st, honoring sensual pleasure and the incredible creative energies of the Earth and all her creatures, is all about pleasing and praising the body.

Isn't that just the best?

With or without a lover, now is the time for honoring our gorgeous selves, and connecting with nature in the most pleasing ways...

Adorning yourself with sweet blossoms is a purrfect way to begin. 

Image by  VK-Red

Image by VK-Red

What makes you feel really sexy and alive?

How about a saucy twist on the traditional Maypole...

A pole dance class may seem intimidating, but let me tell you it is incredibly empowering...when you can flip your legs over your head, the upper body strength alone will make you feel like Catwoman.

Wanna really peel away the old selves? Try a burlesque class. Trust me. I had the time of my life with Michelle L'Amour in San Francisco a few moons ago...everyone in the class did. If you're near a major city, look up performers who teach. You will be SO glad you did. (If you happen to be in NYC this month, check out Veronica Varlow's Spellbinding Burlesque class. It's going to be sublime. I'll be there, so get some friends together and dance with us! )  If you live in a far-off magical land, browse the web for videos and online classes. And definitely  delve into Kitty Cavalier's jewel box of a website...she knows just what you need to get your goddess mojo in gear...

And don't forget your lair. This would be just the time to lust up the den. Again, it's for YOU. With whom you share it, or not, is nobody's business. Candles, flowers, incense, new sheets, a gorgeous picture book to flip through while you daydream...

And, of course, La Cucina.

Your kitchen altar would wildly appreciate some fragrant fresh herbs and flowers...she just wanted you to know...

Which reminds me.

Food is sexy.

How about a voluptuous little cake, in the traditional festival style, but without all the pointless ingredients that sap you? I want you to be glowing and impossibly beautiful, blooming with great energy, when you cast your spell...

Strawberry Oat Cakes 

  • 2 C gluten-free organic oat flour 
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1/4 tsp Celtic or Himalayan salt
  • 1 tsp cinnamon
  • 1 Tbsp Madagascar or Tahitian vanilla powder
  • 20 drops liquid stevia (vanilla or almond)
  • 1/4 C organic raw coconut oil, melted
  • 1/4 C almond or coconut milk
  • 1 jar sugar free, organic, fruit-only strawberry preserves

Preheat your oven to 350F. Use a little olive oil on a paper towel to lubricate (ahem) two muffin tins.

The real flavor secret here is in the vanilla powder. I use this one:

The warm, earthy-sweet vanilla spell it casts is world's apart from a traditional extract, and so much easier than dissecting a vanilla bean. I use it everything now...shakes, power balls, coffee...mmmmm!

If you can't find the oat flour, you can buy gluten-free oats in bulk, and blast them in your food processor or blender. Just combine all the ingredients except the preserves in a large bowl, and whisk until everything is well acquainted. The mixture will be a little sticky and oaty. 

Get in with your hands, and press spoonfuls of the mixture into the bottoms of the muffin tins. Keep them even. Now top each with a dollop of the preserves. You can give it as much as you like, but try to spread the preserves in the center, as when they bake it will spread to the sides and down, depending on how much you use. I like them gooey, so I use a little extra.

Bake for about 20 minutes. I overdid mine a little, so they were a bit crumbly, but sooo good...

The vanilla cake is heavenly, and the sticky topping just begs to be licked off fingers.

Revel in your beautiful selves, My Pretties. 

Bask in the joy and sensuality of the season...

I adore you.

xxx Alise

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The Big O

An icy wet nose nuzzled my toes awake.

I was aware of 

 a panther’s tail caressing my cheek

the strong muscular arm of my co-star pulling me in close

the ruby light of bright sun through silky drapes

warm bare shoulders

my whole body was liquid with rest

all the birds fluttered, singing

it wasn’t just the crows, who bring wisdom every morning,

but I could hear everyone gathered

the percussive woodpecker rhythms

bluejays, robins, chickadees...

was I dreaming?

was it possible...that Spring was actually here?

She wasn’t just being a tease?

After all, snow was still miles high upon the ground here in the mountains, and the week ahead forecasted more coooolllllld.

And yet...

Ostara.

The ancient pagan tradition of the Vernal Equinox. 

Fertility.  Sowing seeds. Rebirth.

Time to send new creations out into the world.

Awakening after the long Winter's night.

She's stirring, inside me, and everywhere...

Ostara

I sat upright very suddenly.

All I could think was,

“I need a scone.”

Then I sat paralyzed for the next however many minutes fretting.

I didn't have the proper ingredients for a Very Important Ostara Offering. Hmmm...maybe if I race out, I can pick up some calendula flowers...if they have them...oh! maybe I should call..what if my readers are disappointed if I don't have something awesomely, purrfectly Spring-y for them...fret...fret...

Wait. I’m just going to work with what’s here.

I had to set my ritual space before anything could happen.

So I started playing Ella Fitzgerald, setting the stage for an upbeat, swingy Kitchen Witching...

but that wasn’t happening.

I switched to sultry ragas. 

Oh yes...

yesss...that’s it.

undulating all the constellations of bellydance

I began to feel intense heat, wild cosmic pattens

trance, 

sitar and tabla,

And the spices came out.

The kitchen filled with exotic heat. I began to move...I imagined I was dancing in the desert at sunset feelng the warm sand beneath my feet...

And these happened.

Sultry Spiced Scones

  • 1  C organic garbanzo flour 
  • 3/4 C tapioca flour
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp Baking Soda
  • 1/4 tsp Celtic salt
  • 4 Tbsp coconut oil, chilled
  • 3/4 C unwseetened almond milk
  • 1 Tbsp garam masala
  • 1 Tbsp cinnamon
  • 3-4 droppers liquid stevia
  • pinch of Spanish paprika
  • 1 C chopped apples, fresh or dried
  • 1 C chopped dates
  • 1 Tbsp vanilla

Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees. Sift the dry ingredients (minus spices) together in a large bowl. Add the spices and stir. Now cut in the chilled coconut oil with a pastry cutter or a fork until the mixture is crumbly. 

Add in the vanilla and almond milk, and stir. Drop in the dates and apples. Get in there with your hands to really mix everything together well. If it needs it, add a tablespoon or more of almond milk.

Drop rounded tablespoonfuls of dough onto a lightly olive oiled cookie sheet. You can make either six large ones or about ten small. (These are best straight from the oven, so I would go for the larger ones. You can re-heat the next day, but it's not quite as orgasmic.)

I used dried apples here, because I had fed the last of the fresh ones to my goat friend, who lives down the lane.

The scent filling the kitchen was so heady, I couldn't wait for them to cool...

I bit in.

Ohh...

The flavor at first was subtle, warm...a beautiful light, airy treasure cloaked inside a crispy shell of buttery, sensuous coconut oil.

Then the heat and the layers kick in.

And My Darlings, these are seriously heaven.

I ate a second one in sheer delight, this time with a cup of pau d’arco tea, though I wanted something vanilla-y. I haven’t been stocking much tea latley as I am working on my own brews...

(Hint, hint...more to come soon!)

So here they are: mouth-teasing delights that were born of sitar and passion.

Bake them. Devour them. Enjoy every bite.

Then, get over here and nibble on me.

xxx Alise

 

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Purrfect Pumpkin Bread

Winter, WHAT are you doing? 

We were having such a sublime Fall.  We are NOT ready for you yet!

(Don’t annoy the Autumnal Fairy.)

The Autumnal Fairy is being chased through the forest by  this  guy...though she doesn't seem to mind...

The Autumnal Fairy is being chased through the forest by this guy...though she doesn't seem to mind...

Tell you what. 

Here is an offering...it’s vegan, gluten free, sugar free, and it is dee-lish.

Go ahead. Take a big piece.  

Better yet, take the whole thing.

Purrfect Pumpkin Bread.jpg

There you go...now don’t come back until December, okay? January?

Purrfect Pumpkin Bread

Dry Ingredients:

  • 2-1/2 C. gluten-free organic baking flour 
  • 3/4 C. xylitol
  • 2 Tbsp arrowroot powder
  • 1 Tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 Tsp xanthan gum
  • 1Tbsp cinnamon
  • 1 tsp cloves
  • 1 tsp nutmeg
  • 1/4 tsp ginger
  • 1/4 tsp himalayan salt

Wet Ingredients:

  • 1 80z can org pumpkin puree (NOT pie filling!)
  • 1 C. hot spring water
  • 1/3 C. coconut oil, melted
  • 2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 20 drops liquid vanilla stevia
  • 1 C. toasted walnut pieces 

You can get all the exotic ingredients in your local health food store (some available in the bulk section), or online www.vitacost.com. As always, make sure all ingredients-including spices- are organic whenever possible.

Preheat oven to 350. Oil the bottom of a loaf pan.

Whisk together dry ingredients. Mix wet ingredients separately.

Combine dry into wet ingredients, slowly, whisking as you pour.

Bake for 45-60 minutes in a loaf pan. (I made this one in a brownie pan, so it looks a little weird.)  It is done when a toothpick in the center comes out clean. Let it cool completely, then slice, and dust the top with cinnamon. 

Fall-ing for You,

xxxAlise